Apa Ko Hendakkan Dariku

Telah ku melangkah diriku ke hadapan,
Mengapa mu hendakkan menahanku
daripada meninggalkan silamku,
Adakah ku telah berdosa amat terhadapmu?
Sudah ku melepaskan semuanya,
Tidak juga mu fahami.

Perkara yang diperihalkan dikatakan
amat muda,
Entahlah apa perkara yang dapat
dijadikan berharga,
Apa ko hendakkan dariku,
Telah cukup mu menghisap darah,
Hantu sepertimu sudah cukup di sekitarku.

Cukuplah mu!
Jangan sampai apiku mula membara,
Jangan hinggakan diriku yang lampau
timbul dari kubur,
Telah cukupku saksikan.

Hendakkan ku buat mu faham,
Tapi untuk apa,
Telah ku sampai di tempat perjumpaan,
Tapi di mana mu?
Tak juga ku lihat-lihatkan,
Alangkah baiknya jika bukan begitu.

Pedih di hati bila diludah di muka oleh
yang disangkakan sahabat,
Tidak sampai hatiku melihatnya,
Salah yang dilakukanmu tidak dirasa,
Bermaharajalela mu di sini sana,
Mu tidak akan bermain lama di sini.

Balasan siap tertulis oleh takdir,
Sehingga itu akan ku perlahan-lahan
menahan kerenahmu,
Bila mu ditimpa suratan takdir
janganlah salahkanku,
Mu yang bawakan ke atas dirimu,
Kalau boleh sehingga masa itu
senyaplah.

Ps:Mu dan aku cuma berdiri pada tanah yang sama.Janganlah mu sangkakan mu itu di kayangan.Akan mu jatuh ke tempat asalmu suatu hari nanti.

Tengah Bercuti Ba

Sudahlah sampai cutiku akhirnya.Nasibku amat baik sekali.Sudah empat tahun ku tak pulang ke kampung halaman.Akhirnya ku sudah berpeluang untuk pulang ke Siam untuk berehat.Sesudah sampainya  cuti ini,telah ku sedari betapa penatnya ku.Penatnya teramat sekali sehingga ku rasai betapa rindunya ku terhadap masa lampau.Entah ba apa yang ku akan buatkan semasa ku sampai di sana nanti.

Lima hari di sana akan ku gunakan sehabis-habisnya.Untuk apa ku penatkan diriku sehingga begini.Cuma ku yang tahu.Cuti sekolah terkini ini patut digunakan untuk berehat dengan secukupnya.Maklum ba lepas masuk tahun baru,cuti tidak akan seperti cuti kerana kita akan menghidapi penyakit.Penyakit apa itu orang akan bilang samaku.Ku akan menjawab penyakit peperiksaan la sayang!Semua budak-budak 6 Atas akan menghidapinya.Sepanjang itu,tidur dan makan pun tidak akan cukup masanya.

Sepanjang cuti ini telah ku rancangkan beberapa perkara untuk kecapi.Cuma kini perlu ku untuk melaksanakannya.Namun yang paling penting ialah untuk rehat secukupnya.Seperti yang ku katakan tadi,lepas ini semua akan menghidapi penyakit.Jadi relaks kita tengah bercuti ba!

To Say What I Needed To Say

It's a final relieve that i could get everything out that i have kept within me.It was a frustrating business to be a monitor and a student at the same time.I'm a man with many flaws and never expected to be perfect all the time.So i need them to show me my mistakes like a mirror.Same it goes to them.Therefore i don't apprreciate it if someone goes around my back and say things about me.If there is any problem one would just need to come forth and confront me.A person who could give a constructive criticism is a winner then the person who could not accept it.Thus one must confront the situation beforehand.To be accused as a molester in front of a teacher really pisses me off.I'm a man and i do like ladies but i do know how to respect a ladies body.

As so most of us will be together for another year.We have to learn to cooperate and accept one another.Don't judge a person for what he is on the outside but instead learn to judge from the inside of someone.I admit that i'm a Barbarian but i'm willing to accept anyone into my circle of friends.As for the others who think that they someone of higher status that could not accept me.I'm very fine with it.I look forward to find a more meaningful friendship.At the same time don't ever judge others by their skin colour.We are staying together in Malaysia we should to forge that spirit of Bangsa Malaysia to live as one under the same roof.

As a class monitor,i find it very frustrating to see that i'm the one running when the rest are still sitting down looking at me with a blank stare.I can't just bare the sight to know i have swam to the other side of the river only to turn behind to see that the other twenty three are still over the other side of the river and still have not cross it.I don't mind if they have crossed it even if i have to stay behind to make sure that they have crossed the river safely.My concept has always been one rise all rise,one fall all fall.That was how i was trained and brought up to be.Rank is not a privilage but a burden that you must bare until the very end.

I have walked to where i have to meet them.The questions remains is wheter they have walked to where am i standing now.I don't want any sorry or to be sorry at.I just want to forgive and forget.Let the past be bygone.I want some peace within me.It's time for me to let go and let my time past.At this stage of my life,i have looked behind and realised that i have walked a long road and the journey ahead of me is still long and hard.

As much i have sinned towards others,they too have sinned that much towards me.If i have done any mistakes towards any of you.Please accept my humble apologies and please guide me to the right track.I have finally have said what i needed to say after these six months. 

Dalam Perjalanan

Mungkinkah aku telah menemui jawapannya,

Telah ku genggamkan sehingga menjadi abu,

Cuma berharapan aku telah melaksanakannya,

Kini aku ingin mencari ketenangan dalam diriku,

Telah sampai masanya ku berundur.

Pangkat itu bukannya satu anugerah,

Tapi ianya satu beban yang harus dipikul

sehingga ke hujung jalan,

Aku sanggup memikulnya,

Aku di sini menahan setiap saatnya,

Sehingga semua telah sampai dengan selamat,

Biarpun badanku binasa.

Sekelilingku tiada sesiapa pun,

Berjalan seorang diri di dalam gelap,

Kalaulah ini hanyalah satu mimpi,

Kenyataan memang nyata,

Sakit itu terasa amat dalam diriku.

Namun aku cuma seorang manusia,

Tanpa keperitan maka tiada makna

dalam diriku,

Menoleh ke belakang telah ku sedari,

Telah jauh ku berjalan,

Kini aku di sini,

Ku hendak menjelajah lagi,

Masih banyak perlu ku pelajari
dalam perjalanan.

Orders

Orders are orders you must execute them.The differences are the officers that are executing the orders.

Lt.Azwar bin Abdul Talib(TLDM)

Kem Plkn Paya Indah,Kuala Langat,Selangor.

Warning

To you fellows who have turn my c-box into a pure crap box.This is warning for you guys to get out before your IP add is banned.

I have created this blog in the intention of sharing my ideas and lessons that i have learned in my life with others.Therefore in return i would appreciate it if the readers could share constructive ideas and criticism with me.Not in the intention for you guys to pour nonsense all over it.

I welcome everyone into my blog.No one would be rejected and please change your mindset.Use blogs for good use.If you wish to spam,please go make your own and spam yours.Please heed my request.

Eversince That Day

Minutes and seconds passed by,
Finally i got the courage to say it to you,
Your smile gave me hope,
But the reply was a stab to my heart,
I choose to wait with hope,
That one day you will accept me in you,
As how i hold you dear in me.

For now i must retreat,
For i do not wish to stir wrong intentions,
Still thinking of you in my mind,
Oh I can't smile without you,
I can't live without you,
I find it hard to do anything.

I just can't stand the silence,
I just can't stand being insane,
When you don't say a thing to me,
It's been like this ever since that day,
When you said I'm sorry,
Oh I'll wait for you,
I will.

Note:This was written on hope that one day if she ever passes by would read it.I just don't know what else to do.